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Funny Golf Lingo

Golf has lots of great sayings, here are a few of them. 

You hit the ball fat. Instead of saying "damn I hit that fat." Using No Three Putts golf lingo you'd say "damn that was a Rosie O'Donnell."

If you hit a horrible shot that is just ugly, that's a Tom Kite.

A shot that comes up short or a nasty little 5 footer is a Danny Devito.

A great drive that you hit long and hard is a Ron Jeremy.

You hit a ball really thin, but it still looks pretty damn good, that's a Paris Hilton. For those of you that saw her infamous video you could also use her name if you hit a shot that sucks.

You hit a great shot that is just killer, or if you hit a shot and just got away with it, that's an O.J. Simpson.

If you hit a lot of hooks, you're obviously a hooker, instead I'd call you a Heidi Fleiss.

If you're playing with someone that cheats, he's a Martha Stewart.

You hit one in the bunker and it's hiding in the sand like a scared little girl, that shot would be a Saddam Hussein.

If you take two shots in the bunker its an Adolf Hitler.

If you overclubbed its a Rodney King.

A Condom shot is one that is safe but did not feel good.

Taking a Gerry Adams is hitting a provisional.

A George Micheal is a putt you thought was straight but wasn't.

A Ladyboy looks an easy hole but wasn't what you expected.

A Kate Winslett is a shot that is a bit fat but otherwise perfect.

A sister in law is up there but I know I shouldn't be.



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