Kiwi Slang

Gidday is cow ‘cockie' talk. Much of the Kiwi (a New Zealander) lingo comes from either the Maori or farming groups. You will hear these people talk about the ‘girls’ (their cows), their ‘gummies’ (Wellington boots or galoshes), and the ‘better-half’ , ‘other half’ or missus, yes, the wife. The term depends on the mood SHE is in, I think. They will call you ‘mate’, or ‘cobber’, a ‘bro’ or a ‘cuz’, even if they don’t know you. They are all good terms - it just means the chap likes you. The term ‘ehu’ (pronounced Aho) is fine as well, that’s just a friend. If you are buying a beer you will want a ‘handle’ or a ‘jug’. You can get a glass ( 7 oz) but you’d have to ask.

It pays to be careful if you are taking directions from these locals, though. For example, if you ask where somebody lives, you are likely to hear, ‘just around the corner’, ‘just down the road’, ‘just over the hill’ or worse ‘next door’. That’s where the term ‘somewhere near Taupo’ comes from. Kiwis figure that to anyone that comes from a large continent such as America or Australia, anywhere in New Zealand, is near Taupo. Just remember that a country mile is as long as a piece of string, and you won’t be far wrong.

Shopping is a breeze. We do have supermarkets and loads of specialty stores. But if you are shopping for Kiwi friends, take a few notes. 'Spuds' are potatoes, ‘Vogels’ is a type of bread. You won’t find toheroa, tua tua, or kina, as they are a type of shell fish and you pick them off the beach. And if your kiwi friends say ‘let’s go get some mussels (or scallops) for the 'barbie’, they are talking about a trek over the rocks, not a trip to the shops. An extra note about the barbie, don’t be surprised if it is done as a hole in the ground - that’s a hangi, and a perfectly acceptable way of cooking food. It does taste wonderful. If you are wanting something particularly kiwi in the food line try the Vogels, hokey pokey ice-cream, vegemite, or Lemon and Paeroa.

The kiwis are a neat bunch. They will stand in the local in their gummies or their jandels (thongs), they wear togs, not a swimsuit, they will have a bevy or a tinnie (can of beer) and always invite you to join them. You’ll have to view a New Zealand Toyota advertisement to realize the significance of "bugger". Another great New Zealand advert - "you’ll always be a kiwi, if you love our Watties sauce", that’s tomato sauce and kiwis seem to pile it on everything. They are the masters of understatement, as one man was quoted when his house was under water "she’ll be right, mate". And you know, it usually is.
Well its off down to the shed, with a ‘get in behind’ to the dog, the girls need milking, so its into my gummies and ‘I’ll catch ya later’. That’s goodbye.